Thursday, June 18, 2009

Dance Your Ass Off!!!!

Anyone that knows me will tell you that so far, 2009 has been a real shitter. One thing after another.. bad luck seems to be raining over me like cats and dogs on this Silverlake resident. I've been fired more times than a ceramics class project, and on top of that, someone decided to steal the racks off my car with a screwdriver, leaving me not only bike rack-less, but also with a scratched, dented, and skated car roof top. But then someone decided to brighten my life with a little link to a new TV show that is premiering on June 29th on the Oxygen network.
Before I get to far, let me explain that I love fat people. Not sure why, but I do. If you have ever pulled up to a stop light, looked over, and saw a 400lb person eating a triple bacon swiss jalapeno burger...you know what I mean. Amazing right? Some would say that its cruel to stare at fat people eating, but I disagree. Its like watching a heroin addict shoot up. Its their shit...their bomb...I wish I could shoot up, life would be a whole lot easier. If I could stuff my face with 7lb burgers, I'd do that too....but I cant. Its all tooooo good, and we all know that if anything is amazingly good and enjoyable, then inevitably its bad for you. Cigarettes, booze, hookers, drugs, and food in large dripping delicious bacony cheesy dripping secret sauce down my wrist quantity's are all bad for you. You know whats not bad for you (unless you live in that town where Footloose was filmed because what I'm about to mention is illegal there) DANCING!!! and what do you get when you mix dancing and fat people??????.........


You're very welcome.

1 comment:

SugarMolt said...

You are aware that there is something seriously wrong with you right?